Role of Stress in our everyday life

[Anderson]

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Stress, Ahhhh! :)

*Phone ringing*
"Hello?"
"Hey listen, I don't quite understand what's going on with us. The guys just said that we missed another deadline. Our release has been postponed again. We're all losing money here, and no one can get ahold of you. Can you explain what's going on? What are we waiting for?"

"Listen, the tax office called. You have a six-month overdue payment. Are you planning to pay at all?"
"It's your neighbour. Your car has a flat tire... either it's punctured or..."
"Hey, this is not okay. The deadlines are not just tight; they are gone."
"Son, hi, why don’t you call? Don’t you care about your mother anymore?"

What is Stress?

Stress is everything that happens to us—studies, work, relationships, and even relaxation. It's any shock that disrupts the stable state of the body. For the body, there's no difference why you're worried. Stress is the body's departure from homeostasis to mobilize resources to deal with an adverse situation.

If you're a lion and you see a zebra you want to eat, you experience stress, accompanied by adrenaline, cortisol, and dopamine to catch the zebra. If you're a zebra, stress triggers the "fight or flight" mode to escape from the lion. The same mechanisms apply to humans. Our bodies don't know we no longer need to run from lions or chase zebras. Evolutionary time has been too short to change this response.

The Misconception of Eliminating Stress

Popular psychology often promises to rid you of stress forever, but this is misleading. Stress is a natural response. Viewing it as unhealthy leads to more stress—worrying about stress itself. While stress can exhaust and weaken you, it also invigorates, helping overcome challenges. Avoiding stress only improves life if you agree to do nothing at all, which is impractical.

Embracing Stress for Achievements

To achieve your goals, be it a beautiful and intelligent partner, wealth, respect, or children, or even an RTX 4090 for your computer, you will inevitably face stress. Absolute zen is philosophically appealing, but physiologically, you will need to exert yourself. If peace and health are your goals, then major achievements might be out of reach.

Chronic Stress vs. Short-term Stress

Short-term stress can enhance mental and physical performance, increase focus, and boost motivation—a brief evolutionary boost to handle tough situations. However, chronic stress, akin to running a marathon daily under duress, can be harmful. It’s challenging to distinguish between short-term and chronic stress in real life. Chronic stress leads to issues like gastritis and stomach ulcers. Hans Selye's experiments in the 1930s showed that stress could cause ulcers in lab rats, not the cow ovary extract he was testing.

The Impact on Mental Health

Chronic stress can cause mental health issues like depression. It's important to differentiate between temporary mood dips and clinical depression, which is marked by prolonged anhedonia. Seeking a therapist is crucial for dealing with severe mental health issues.

The Illusion of Control and Business Stress

Entrepreneurs, despite their stressful lives, tend to live longer. Studies show they live about 7% longer, which translates to 4-6 extra years. Stress in this context is associated with better outcomes, like financial success and recognition.

Dealing with Stress

Ultimately, whether stress leads to success or health issues depends on how it's managed. While chronic stress can be damaging, the achievements it drives can improve life quality significantly. Balancing stress and relaxation, acknowledging the role of stress in our lives, and seeking help when needed are crucial for a healthy, fulfilling life.

[Nancy]

I would like to share a story...

Alex was a gifted composer, known for creating music that moved people to tears and lifted their spirits. His melodies were celebrated in concert halls around the world, and he had built a reputation as a musical genius. But with success came pressure. 

One day, Alex was commissioned to write a symphony for a prestigious orchestra. The deadline was tight, but Alex, driven by his love for music and the thrill of a challenge, accepted it. At first, inspiration flowed easily. He spent days and nights at his piano, letting the notes pour out of him, lost in the beauty of creation.

But as the deadline approached, something changed. The ideas that once came effortlessly began to stall. Each note he played seemed off, and the melodies that once danced in his mind now eluded him. The pressure to deliver something extraordinary began to weigh heavily on his shoulders.

Then, life started piling on more stress. His phone rang constantly—messages from the orchestra asking for progress updates, reminders from the tax office about overdue payments, even a call from his mother wondering why he hadn't visited in so long. The stress became suffocating, and Alex found himself staring at the blank sheet music, unable to compose a single note.

Days turned into sleepless nights, and Alex began to doubt himself. The joy of creating music was replaced by anxiety and fear. His body ached from the tension, and his mind was clouded with worry. The once-clear vision of his symphony was now a chaotic mess of unfinished ideas.

One night, completely exhausted, Alex walked away from his piano and took a stroll through the city. As he wandered, he found himself in a small park, where a street musician was playing a familiar tune. It was simple, yet beautiful, and it reminded Alex of why he had fallen in love with music in the first place.

He sat on a bench and closed his eyes, letting the music wash over him. In that moment, he realized something important—he had been so focused on perfection, so consumed by stress, that he had lost sight of the joy in his work. The pressure to create something great had turned his passion into a burden.

Alex returned to his studio with a new mindset. Instead of worrying about the deadline, he focused on the music itself—the way it made him feel, the emotions it evoked. He allowed himself to be imperfect, to make mistakes, and to find beauty in the process rather than the outcome.

The symphony was finished just in time. It wasn’t flawless, but it was honest, full of emotion and life. When it was performed, it moved the audience in a way that Alex had never anticipated. The critics praised it, calling it his most personal and powerful work yet.

And Alex? He learned that stress, while challenging, could also be a source of creativity and growth. By embracing it rather than fighting it, he discovered a deeper connection to his music and to himself.

[Monk]

Here is my five cents...my story about eustress and distress. they are very different...

A few years ago, you found yourself in a whirlwind of responsibilities that felt both exciting and overwhelming. You had just been promoted to a leadership role at work, a position you had been striving for over the past few years. The promotion came with new challenges—managing a team, meeting tight deadlines, and navigating high-stakes projects. At the same time, you had decided to sign up for a marathon, something that had been on your bucket list for years.

At first, the pressure of your new role was exhilarating. You were motivated to prove yourself, to lead your team to success, and to tackle the challenges head-on. Each day brought new opportunities to learn and grow, and though the workload was heavy, you felt energized by the responsibility. This was eustress at work—the kind of stress that pushed you to be your best and kept you engaged.

Training for the marathon was similarly rewarding. Every run felt like a step closer to achieving a long-held dream. The physical exertion, while tough, left you with a sense of accomplishment. You found that the discipline required for marathon training was also helping you stay focused at work. The stress of preparing for such a big event actually boosted your confidence and resilience. This was another form of eustress—positive stress that was helping you grow both physically and mentally.

However, as the weeks went by, things started to change. The demands of your job began to pile up, and the marathon was fast approaching. Late nights at the office were followed by early morning runs, and the balance you had once maintained started to slip. What was once an exciting challenge now felt like a burden. The constant pressure to perform at work and in your personal goals started to take a toll on you.

You noticed you were becoming more irritable, struggling to sleep, and feeling perpetually exhausted. The stress that had once driven you was now dragging you down. You found yourself dreading the things you once looked forward to—the work projects, the marathon training—all of it felt overwhelming. This was distress creeping in, and it was taking a toll on your well-being.

One night, after a particularly rough day at work and a frustrating run, you sat down and realized something needed to change. You thought back to when stress had felt motivating and recognized that what you were feeling now was different. The stress you were experiencing was no longer pushing you forward; it was holding you back.

You decided to take a step back and reassess. You spoke with your manager about redistributing some of your workload and took a day off to recharge. For your marathon training, you adjusted your schedule to allow more recovery time, recognizing that overtraining was doing more harm than good. 

With these changes, you began to feel the difference. The positive aspects of stress returned—once again, you felt motivated at work and enjoyed your runs. The heavy, overwhelming feeling of distress lifted as you found a healthier balance.

Through this experience, I learned the crucial difference between eustress and distress Eustress was the force that propelled you towards your goals, while distress was what happened when that force became too much to handle. Recognizing this difference allowed me to navigate future challenges with a clearer understanding of how to manage stress in a way that fuels growth rather than hinders it.

And now, when I face new challenges, you remember that stress isn’t the enemy—it’s how you manage it that makes all the difference.

Edited August 10 by Monk