The Paradox of Progress | How Clinging to the Past Limits Future Potential

[Olga]

It is possible to predict, although some believe that the future can still be planned. But planning the future is actually planning the present. Because the real future is about unpredictability. It's the unknown that brings anxiety into our lives because we don't know what and how things will turn out. However, growth, development, and potential improvements always lie in the future because they don't exist in the past. In the past, there is only what has already happened and what is doomed to repeat; it cannot be anything else. It can only become something different in the future.

This choice can also be defined through experience. Choosing the past is a choice based on the experiences we have already had. It doesn’t necessarily mean it will be a situation identical to one we’ve encountered before. It could be a completely different situation, but the choice to act or not act in it will be made with the experience we’ve lived through in mind.

For example, if you've had difficulties working in the construction industry, when searching for a new job, you might avoid considering construction positions in order to choose a “future.” However, in reality, this is a choice in favor of the “past,” because when looking for a new job, you're basing your decision on old experiences. You remember that it was bad on the construction site, so you won’t go back there—your old experience, your past, limits your choice of the future, and you end up in the same cycle. As long as your past experience in construction weighs on you, as long as you remember it and avoid repeating it or simply take it into account when choosing a new job, you will continue to seek work based on that experience. And this is a choice in favor of the past, which can cause you to learn the same lesson over and over again.

The Plan

To truly move beyond the limitations of the past, we must first recognize the patterns that keep us stuck. It’s essential to understand that while our past experiences offer valuable lessons, they should guide us, not define us. Embracing the uncertainty of the future allows us to break free from repetitive cycles and make choices that lead to growth. By focusing on the present, taking small risks, and reframing our past failures as lessons rather than obstacles, we can avoid the trap of reliving yesterday and start building a future that’s truly different. Our past should inform our decisions, but not dictate them. The key to a transformed tomorrow lies in the choices we make today.

[Anderson]

While our past experiences are valuable and inform our decisions, relying too heavily on them can trap us in repetitive cycles and limit our potential for growth. True development and positive change lie in embracing the unpredictability of the future. To move forward, we must balance learning from the past with being open to new possibilities, even if they seem uncertain or risky. By doing so, we can break free from old patterns and create a future that is different from the past.

 

[Olga]

One of our deepest fears is uncertainty. We struggle to understand what’s happening around us now and what will happen next. In today's world, making sense of things is incredibly difficult. Over time, we've grown so disappointed in our attempts to grasp what’s going on that we often just give up. We might have some vague ideas or impressions, but a true, clear understanding of the present reality eludes us. 

This sense of disillusionment leads us to think, "What does it matter? It’s all the same, whether we try to make sense of it or not." This mindset is a powerful internal stressor. The fear of uncertainty works on us at a subconscious level, even if we consciously tell ourselves, “It’ll all work out somehow.” While we might push the fear away in our minds, deep down, our psyche struggles. 

Without a clear image of the future, without specific goals or tasks, our inner world becomes chaotic and restless, not knowing what to react to or prepare for. This turmoil makes us act irrationally, causing us to make mistakes that seem completely avoidable. Perhaps the biggest mistake we make in this state of mind is doing nothing at all—paralysis, the kind of inactivity that is a hallmark of stress triggered by uncertainty. 

On the subconscious level, this inactivity can manifest as procrastination, avoidance, or just a sense of being stuck, unable to move forward or make decisions. This isn’t just an abstract feeling; it shows up in our daily lives—missed opportunities, stagnation in our careers, strained relationships, and an overall sense of dissatisfaction. The lack of clarity can also lead to impulsive decisions, as our brain desperately seeks some form of control, often choosing poorly simply to break the stalemate of inaction.

From a broader perspective, living in constant uncertainty can wear down our mental health, leading to anxiety, chronic stress, and even depression. It also affects our physical health—stress and anxiety can cause insomnia, weaken our immune system, and lead to various stress-related illnesses. Essentially, uncertainty can throw our entire mind-body system into disarray.

Final Thoughts on This

Living with constant uncertainty is one of the toughest challenges of modern life. It’s not just about the lack of information; it’s about the emotional and psychological toll that this ambiguity takes on us. The key to dealing with uncertainty is not necessarily to eliminate it (which is impossible) but to build resilience against it. This means developing coping mechanisms, such as mindfulness to stay present, goal-setting even if the goals are small, and learning to focus on what you can control rather than what you can’t. 

It’s also important to nurture a flexible mindset, where you learn to adapt and pivot rather than be paralyzed by indecision. Seeking connection with others, sharing our fears and uncertainties, and supporting one another can also provide a sense of stability. Ultimately, it’s about shifting our relationship with uncertainty—understanding that it’s a part of life and finding ways to navigate through it with as much grace and strength as possible.

[Anderson]

Every time we revisit our memories, we essentially rewrite them. When we recall something, we do so within a new context and with new knowledge about the world. Each time you return to a memory, you’re not just remembering it—you’re actively altering it, whether you realize it or not. 

Sometimes, our memories improve with time, glossed over by nostalgia or softened by new insights. Other times, they grow worse, perhaps twisted by negative experiences or emotions that have colored them in retrospect. This phenomenon is what psychologists refer to as a "story based on real events." The events themselves may have happened, but the story we tell ourselves is never quite the same—it’s always a version, shaped and reshaped by how we feel, what we know, and how we’ve changed over time.

Thoughts

Memory is a fascinating and complex process that blends fact with emotion and interpretation. This is both a gift and a challenge. On one hand, it allows us to adapt and make peace with our pasts, finding new meanings and lessons in our experiences. On the other hand, it means that our memories are not always reliable. They’re subjective, influenced by our current state of mind, our biases, and even our hopes and fears. 

Understanding this can be incredibly empowering—it gives us the freedom to reinterpret our past in ways that serve us better in the present. However, it also reminds us that clinging too tightly to our version of events can sometimes be misleading. Embracing the fluidity of memory allows us to be kinder to ourselves and others, recognizing that our stories are ever-evolving narratives shaped by more than just the events that happened.